It's alive! It's ALIVE!
I've always wanted to say that. We've spent months waiting in the wings, determined to give you the absolute best in the world of online comics. We wanted to tweak every line to perfefction, subtly adjust the color of every background, and isolate only the most deviously amusing concepts to bring our readers a superior experience of Funny.
Then we decided, screw that, it'll take forever. We still hope to bring home the Funny in such a fashion that you can lean back, throw your feet up on the desk, and enjoy the unbound Prometheus of four guys from Boston, and the collective experiences that are their Day-to-Day Lives™. And, hey, if you wanna read CXM naked, we fully encourage that. I mean, go ahead. Uh, you
might want close your blinds. Yeah, I'm talking to you.
Being the holiday season, I would like to extend a hearty Happy Holidays from the CXM crew to you. Whether you're celebrating Christmas, Hannukah, Kwanzaa, Ramadan, the Winter Solstice, or any of a variety of likewise festive
occasions, we hope that you will take the time out of your busy schedule to do something good for your fellow human.
Our gift to people - and no, you can't exchange
it - is this Christmas bonus
. If you always thought Santa was a little sinister, we couldn't agree more. I mean, coming down the chimney? Helloooo? Breaking and entering, anybody? And leaving "toys" and "candy" in the children's stockings? Spirit of giving what
exactly? We're not sure, but we're fairly certain that Tony was a result of some of Santa's "gifts". I think I'll pass on the candy canes this year.
I would like to take a moment to introduce the fabulous people who have given the better part of their time in the last five months to brainstorm, work, and eat Chinese food so that CXM could see the light of day (preventing Kai from spilling Chinese food on himself every week really was the hardest part).
Mr. Jason is our artist and Chief Funnyman. He draws all the strips, and hence saves you from the horrible pain of seeing what I would have drawn (did I mention that I'm a big fan of Exploding Dog
?). Jason also draws a strip for his college newspaper called Robots and Spacemen
. I suggest you check it out, because if you haven't, your life is empty and meaningless. I'm sorry, I just call 'em like I see 'em.
Sir Kai is our resident PHP/Web/Photoshop master (and that's not all that he's mastered ). The vivid polychromatic stylings of CXM are brought to you by his mad phat skillz with the Photoshop color tools, and his fluency in HTML and PHP ensure that you can view these maniacal creations across the world (Comics Ex Machina: Creating International Incidents, One Country at a Time). His skillz are, however, offset by the fact that certain movie covers cause him to fall to the floor of our local Blockbuster in paroxysms of hysteria.
The Diabolical Tony is the sole maintainer of the TonyCave®, our home away from home. More than one late night has been spent sequestered in the squalor that is his room, in the attempt to bring forth, from some innocent pieces of wood pulp, graphite, and silicon some semblance of Funny. In the coming months, Tony will prepare to unleash upon the unsuspecting world a strip or two of his own, constructed with two parts depravity, one part ingenuity, and three quarters of a cup of unadulterated crack. Look forward to it. And to fleeing in horror. It'll be fun; we'll have some of those tiny hotdogs wrapped in biscuits. I love those.
And me. I'm the one who gets the pleasure of acting as your intermediary between the relatively sane world where sensible comics such as Dr. Lobster (Steve Died) and Penny Arcade exist, and the utter senselessness of strips such as these.
We sincerely hope that you enjoy reading CXM as much as we enjoy making it. Perhaps occasionally, it might even bring a little spark of light and levity into your house.
Stamp that out, it could cause a fire.
Quote of the Day: "Yeah, there's a lot of bad 'isms' floating around out there, but one of the worst is commercialism. Make a buck, make a buck. Even in Brooklyn it's the same: don't care what the true meaning of Christmas is, just make a buck, make a buck."
-Alfred, Miracle on 34th Street